Hello again,
I recently was at http://www.facebook.com/bydls#!/bydls and this particular article had several negative post. I was in one of those moods were I was not in a negative mood but wanted to be supportive. I felt my heart breaking as I read some of these post so I wanted to reach out a hand or word I guess you would say of my experiences and how they had helped me. I guess I was thinking if I could help one person it would be a good thing.
A few post later I was attacked for some of the things I said. One women was so mad at me because she said "telling someone to get a counselor or go to a pain clinic doesn't help and some of us don't have these luxuries". My comment prier to her saying this was that "I recommend finding a good counselor and pain clinic" I had only recommended it I would never tell someone to get or need to or have to get a counselor. That to me is a decision you have to make on your own and I believe you have to be ready for help before you can ask for it. Her comment about some of us don't have the luxuries really bothered me b/c she just assumed I did. In fact it is just the opposite if it wasn't for state aid I wouldn't be going to any doctors and would still be skipping meals and what ever else so that I could afford my medications.
If you would like to read all of it feel free to I have posted the exact web sight. If you disagree with some of the things I said or feel I was in the wrong please tell me. I am not understanding why me taking the supportive road and not the venting negative road is wrong. Some of the comments really bothered me b/c they were saying things like "God is just stupidity" and I just can't comprehend that. I understand everybody is not like me and I truly believe that you should not push your beliefs on someone else that is a decision they have to make on there own. I am a strong believer that everybody has there own relationship with there own God. I am also a believer that having some form of faith and in my life a prayer circle helps me mentally to gain the strength to get through everyday one day at a time.
I truly want to know peoples thoughts on this. I just don't understand why people with an illness would turn against someone else who also battles the same illnesses. I even had one women say "I do not go through what they do" That really hurt me along with many other emotions like anger. That is when I responded with a venting but yet apologetic post. I couldn't restrain myself. Then I was told "You are a very angry person" I just couldn't win for loosing with my fellow autoimmune disorder family members ( I consider anybody with an autoimmune disorder in a way family ). I don't know why maybe it is my caring and giving personality. My counselor said that I take on a lot of other peoples problems as my own and I want to be almost like a counselor for them. She has explained to me that I can't do that anymore and that I have to take care of myself and not take on other peoples problems as my own.
I understand that I can not take on other peoples problems as my own and I have stopped doing that. I have also learned that peoples insecurities, lack of education, meanness and what ever else they have issues with is not about me and that it is about them. It is about there own insecurities and that I can't take on there problems as being about me. I have realized that it is not about me it is about themselves.
I want everybody to feel free to post your honest opinion and not worry about judgment from me and I hope that no one else will be judgmental but just give there opinion and if you want advise. I love to learn from my mistakes and will be the first to admit when I have done wrong.
Well I guess that is all for now I just needed to get some of this off of my chest. I read it all to my mom and she said she needs to get on there b/c she could really stir up some shart. LMBO that's my mom for ya. God I love my mother and she is truly my best friend and I find the older I get the more I am like her. LOL I wish everybody could have the type of relationship with there parents the way that I have with mine.
Well much love and hugs to all
Nickey
This isn't an excuse for those people who are mean and attack other people. I think when people are in this stage of illness, it is anger that controls them, whether at themselves, their illnesses, god, life, or yet another day of being in extreme pain. And then there are some that are always angry and would have been if they were ill or not.
ReplyDeleteAnd as far as your vent is concerned, remember people don't know the whole background, may not have read the comments made, or all the responses. Facebook is a wonderful tool in communicating, but typing doesn't have an influction to tell you the mood. Try not to take it personally.
*many hugs* Jenn